Just Do This, and Any Bad Habit Will Be Gone!

Often we resolve firmly to give up some impure subject matter or old desire, but the very next day we find ourselves back in the same mire. The more strength we put into 'giving up', the more firmly it grips our mind. This failure happens because our struggle is in the wrong direction. It is impossible to overcome habits through willpower alone; for this we must understand the grace of the Lord.

1. Focus Not on Renunciation, But on 'Grasping'

When we constantly dwell on 'giving up' an object or habit, we unknowingly make that very subject deeper and more important in our minds. If you are thinking day and night about that impure subject matter to give it up, then your mind retains its taste, its importance and its contemplation. This wastes the present moment and attachment only increases. The real solution is to abandon the worry about 'giving up' and grasp some 'higher taste' instead. When the mind begins to find taste in the Lord's naam and contemplation, the lower kinds of subjects will automatically lose their hold.

2. 'Planting the Front Foot'

If we don't firmly plant the front foot before lifting the back foot, loss of balance and falling are certain. The same happens with bad habits—we want to give up the old, but we have nothing solid to grasp. Understand this process in this way:

• Planting the Front Foot (Front Foot): First and foremost, firmly anchor your mind in the contemplation of the Lord's naam, rupa, leela and dhaam. This contemplation gives the mind the hold it seeks.
• Lifting the Back Foot (Back Foot): As soon as the hold of the front foot (meditation on the Lord) becomes strong, the back foot (worldly attachment and bad habits) will lift of itself without any mental struggle.

3. The Scissors of Discernment and the Sword of Grace

We often try to cut the bonds of attachment that are years old through the strength of our intellect and discernment. This is the 'scissors of discernment'. Our discernment is like small scissors that tire out trying to cut the infinite threads of attachment. It is an extremely slow and exhausting process in which the chance of failure is high due to ego.

In contrast, when the sadhak surrenders completely, they get the support of the 'sword of grace'. This sword of grace can 'with one stroke' cut to the root the attachment to the splendor of the entire world and desires. Rather than being proud of our limited strength, it is wise to trust in grace.

4. Toys and Longing

When does the Lord intervene in our life? As long as the child is content with 'toys' (worldly sense pleasures) and playing with them, the mother remains busy with her worldly work. But the moment the child tires of those toys, throws them away, and begins to cry out from their heart for the mother with longing, the mother has to abandon all her work and run to them. If a mother does not remain quiet, how can my beloved, who holds the affection of infinite mothers, remain quiet? If they are quiet, then by watching your play—you are somehow consenting to indulge in some subject matter, so they are quiet. The day you become detached from all sense pleasures and cry out from your heart with longing 'O Lord', you will see that the Lord is not far from you.

5. Attachment is an Illusion

Attachment is not the dharma of our (the soul's) nature. Our (the soul's) true nature is 'pure'. What we call our attachment is actually "illusory attachment born of the contact of the senses". It is necessary to understand that no bad habit or attachment can ever touch our fundamental nature (the soul). It is only a temporary wandering of the mind and senses. When you anchor your mind in the Lord, you instantly become free of that illusion and abide in your pure nature.

6. The Test of Honesty

Vowing to improve from tomorrow is a deception. The solution lies in the management of this minute of today. If you anchor this moment in the contemplation of the Lord, both your past and your future will naturally become auspicious. Here it is essential to be an 'honest sadhak'. "Being a traveler on the path of the Lord while nourishing sense desires" is the greatest dishonesty. If we are inwardly consenting to sense pleasures and outwardly pretending renunciation, the Lord will not hear our call. The day we acknowledge our shortcomings (being lustful, wrathful, unrighteous) and completely surrender to the Lord with full honesty, they will make us 'righteous ones' very soon.

Conclusion

The secret to liberation from bad habits does not lie in fighting, but in changing one's 'taste'. When we abandon the worry about 'giving up' and create longing to 'grasp' the Lord, change becomes natural and lasting. The sword of the Lord's grace is ready to cut down all your desires; you need only tire of the toys and call out to them. Now you must calmly engage solely in their contemplation.

Source article: bhajanmarg.com