I Try My Best But Still Make Mistakes—I Have Fallen Into Enormous Debt, What Should I Do?

Shri Hit Radha Keli Kunj, Vrindavan: A private conversation with Pujya Shri Hit Premanand Govind Sharan Ji Maharaj. Sadhaks ask questions about their life and sadhana, and Maharaj Ji provides solutions.

Full Discourse

Radhe Radhe, Gurudev, Bhagwan Ji. Gurudev, I bow at your feet. For just 10-11 months, I have been watching your satsang talks through YouTube. Through your words, I have abandoned all bad habits and indulgence. There is always struggle in life. I don't understand what to do. Where should I go? In these three or four years, I have become nothing. There is still so much debt upon my head. Maharaj Ji, what should I do? Radha Ram, I am also trying. We do not have the capacity for this matter. Because how will your business run? How will your debt be cleared?

At that time when you pursued entertainment and worldly indulgence, you did not take our guidance. What we do, we must experience. Now today, Radha, a new crop is being prepared. A farmer sows today and says, "Give me forty mann in four days for harvest." If he keeps digging repeatedly, the seeds will be destroyed. He won't get a single grain. After five or six months of labour, when he feels his crop is secure, then he harvests forty mann from one bigha. Today you have begun bhakti. You think that your debt will disappear. You will obtain all that you desire—this is impossible.

Because when the body was created, it was formed from a mixture of some sins and some virtues. And when we came into this body, some virtues and some sins formed again. Auspicious and inauspicious. So certainly, avashyam bhogitavyam kritam karma subhashubham—you must experience the fruits of the deeds you perform. Our accumulated karma can be burned by increasing bhajan, but prarabdha—even great saints must experience it. Must experience it, yes? So we do not have such methods or such discussions as, "Do this deed and your debt will vanish. Do this deed and you will get employment. Do this deed and your case will be won, or do this deed and everything will work out for you." We do not have such discussions here. Here we discuss how you can attain Shyama and Shyam, and merely by walking on the path of attaining Shyama and Shyam, all desires are automatically fulfilled. Like a tree—water the root and the water reaches the branches, leaves, flowers, and fruit everywhere. Our discussion is like that: it is about the root. It is about attaining Bhagavan. The jiva attains Bhagavan and realizes supreme bliss. This is why we discuss this. Now we do not know tricks, spells, and charms—that you bind this charm and after a few days your debt will be cleared. We do not have such jugaad. And it seems to me that if you keep chanting naam, this lifetime's debt—what of infinite lifetimes' debts—will be cleared. With faith, we cannot say your debt will definitely be forgiven, but we absolutely say that this lifetime's debt—what of the debts of crores of lifetimes—will be freed from dev rin, pitr rin, rishi rin, matr rin—if we chant naam and call upon Priya, through his grace everything becomes accessible.

But now you must correct your conduct. Now you must improve your behaviour. The past cultivation is very poor. The future crop is ours—it will come. But you must harvest what you have already sown in the past. You do not have such knowledge, you do not have such tapas, you do not have bhajan that you could burn it away. If all karma and impressions were burned through knowledge, then certainly you would still have to experience. So be patient. To take debt and proceed for your advancement is great deception. If debt is taken and business is done, if debt is taken and desires are fulfilled, it seems there is foolishness in this, because if there is loss in business, then the debt is lost and on top of that you suffer the pain of loss. In simple language they say: stretch your legs only as far as your sheet reaches—why did you stretch your legs beyond your sheet?

You did not seek counsel from anyone, from any great souls. One should absolutely not take debt and do business. One debt is taken to hide another, another is taken to hide the second, a third is taken to hide the third. So one mistake is hidden with another, the second is hidden with a third—this is how we fail, this is how we become this. Now correct yourself. Correct yourself now. Everything will be corrected. Bhagavan is very merciful. Take shelter in him. Chant naam. Act righteously. Work hard. Live modestly. Save money and repay your debt. Do we have some magic? You hold such hope, Maharaj Ji? You are my heart. You are my life. Whatever counsel you give is precious as life to me. Now, truly speaking, we have never taken debt, never settled it. We begged, we ate, and we did bhajan. In this matter we have knowledge. Let me—if we had been involved in this matter, we would know everything. Like this—we have begged, we have eaten, and in life we have done bhajan, so we tell those stories of bhajan. We tell the stories of the scriptures. Otherwise, we are learning about the world from you people. Very much we have learned about the world from you people. No, we are people from the banks of the Ganga. We did not have much knowledge. Whatever intelligence we have, whatever could know worldliness, we came to know from you people. These new children who all became sadhus—through them we got information. Otherwise our life was completely solitary. Now this is Bhagavan's leela that he wished to serve us late, so otherwise our life was solitary. Begging and eating, just day and night for our Shri Ji. So it seems to me, brother, if you consider us your heart, then we certainly tell you that taking shelter in Bhagavan and remembering Bhagavan saves you from all these troubles.

The remembrance of Hari destroys all calamities. The forgetting of God is the source of all calamities. As Hanuman said, forgetting the Lord is the only true calamity. So chant the naam. Do jap of the naam. Do bhajan. Chant God's name. Do good deeds. Trust in God. And work hard. [clearing throat sound] What I mean is, reduce your spending on luxury and pay off your debts gradually. There is no need to be worried. It is fine. Yes. Because listen, millions of people listen to us, so some might think, "Baba, will you give us some ash? Will you tie us some charm?" But here we only have bhagvat charcha—discourse about God. There is no such remedy, no charm of any kind. Just chant the naam. Trust in God. Follow the path of truth. Do good deeds. This alone will set everything right.

We have no faith in such things, but for us, Baba, your vani itself is a charm, your words themselves are the remedy. Our Maharaj Ji—there was a time when even bodily afflictions came upon me. But your vani and your remembrance sustained me through it. Maharaj Ji—yes. No, no. You move forward.

In spirituality, do not be sad. Our beloved Sri Radha is so compassionate. You will see it yourself—she makes all obstacles disappear so that the soul finds deliverance and supreme good. We are all lowly. We all make mistakes. But that Lord—our Sri Radha is an ocean of boundless knowledge, an ocean of compassion. Only through her grace can things work out. Do not worry. The one who has come to God—all means are in his hands. They say, when the Lord above gives, he gives by breaking the roof open. He finds a way. He arranges things. He makes it possible. He settles everything. Be at peace. Absolutely be joyful.

Trust in God and chant the naam. Remain under the refuge of God. Some path will emerge that will solve every problem. Look—you are here today, but before we even met, Sri Ji had already solved your problem for you. Is that not so? You were thinking of doing something wrong. We were thinking such harmful thoughts. When satsang came to us, you changed. Today you are sitting here listening. So have faith. You will progress further. There will be light ahead. And if there is sorrow today, it will not remain. If there is happiness today, do not be proud—that too will not remain. Just as the day does not stay, the night comes. Just as the night does not stay, the day comes. So the cycle of happiness and sorrow keeps turning.

Be very careful. Chant the naam. Do not take to any vice. And see that you do not cause suffering to anyone. Just keep this in mind, and the Master—so merciful is he—will arrange everything on his own. Everything will go on. Have complete faith. This whole creation runs by God alone. We are caught in ego, so it seems to us that we are doing it—I did it, I did it. Everything is done by the Sustainer, by Hari. He is doing it. If this understanding comes to us, then we can be at peace right now. Be at peace right now.

This text is taken from the auto-generated captions of a video — there may be errors in the words. Please listen to the video for the authentic discourse.

Original video: Bhajan Marg (YouTube)