When Someone Doesn't Understand What You're Explaining to Them, Anger Arises

Shri Hit Radha Keli Kunj, Vrindavan. Private conversation with Pujya Shri Hit Premanand Govind Sharan Ji Maharaj. Sadhaks place their questions about their life and sadhana, and Maharaj Ji resolves them.

Complete Discourse

Shashank Verma Ji from Muzzaffarpur, Radhe Radhe, Shri Radhavallabh, Shri Harivansh Maharaj Ji. Maharaj Ji, infinite prostrations at your feet. Maharaj Ji, it often happens that when we're explaining something to someone, if they don't understand it or those people insist on their own point of view, anger arises. And after getting angry, we feel bad about ourselves later.

Desire generates anger—when the fulfillment of desire doesn't happen, anger arises. So it seems to us that somewhere we are maintaining selfish interest as primary, and that is when anger comes.

If we teach you with the predominance of selfless compassion and you still don't accept it, then the response comes naturally from within. As God wills. We have tried so that no harm comes to you, so that your welfare may be secured, but you are not accepting it. So, as God wills. You should accept it. This angry tendency of ours arises when we are attached to some selfish interest.

When there is an obstacle to our selfish interest within us, it seems that if this person doesn't accept this, then the fulfillment of our selfish desire won't happen. Whether it is someone from the family or from outside, wherever there is an obstacle to the fulfillment of our desire, anger will arise.

So what we should do is this: if we desire the happiness of others, anger will not arise. Where there is an obstacle to our own happiness, anger will arise.

But when we are teaching you for your welfare, doing it for your well-being, and you still don't accept it, then we will say with a smile, "As God wills," because we have tried to save you, but if you don't want to be saved, then it is God's will. Anger will not arise. Anger will come when we are giving advice out of selfish attachment and you are creating an obstacle to it, then that anger will come—because it is being done for the fulfillment of our own selfishness, whether from family or from outside.

So what we should do is transform selfishness into selfless compassion. If we abandon selfish thinking, then everything becomes auspicious.

And harm from anger befalls only us. Our own heart burns. And if some action happens in anger, it can lead to grave wrongdoing. For instance, we might raise our hand against our parents. We might speak unclean words to elders, or we might enter into violent feelings.

So anger should be suppressed. Keep quiet inside—have no anger at all.

Yes, if we are in a position of authority, if within that realm of authority we have been given government authority, then what we do is not anger—we call that the use of our official position.

For instance, there is someone of wicked nature tormenting a virtuous person. We have the authority to protect the virtuous and punish the wicked. So we use that authority to punish the wicked one and save the other. That is not called anger. Even though it may appear like the play of anger there, it is the use of our authority for the betterment of society and order. If it is necessary to wield the stick, that too is order. If it is necessary to fire a bullet, that too is order. There is no anger in it. It is our government system. If you go against the law like this, then you will be beaten. If you continue like this, then there is also the punishment of hanging. We have all kinds of laws here.

So that is different—what needs to be done according to one's position. But what we are saying in the context of household life is that in household dealings we should avoid anger. And when using official authority, there is no anger. Even while remaining calm, you will have to do that. You have to do it because your authority is to free the innocent and punish the guilty. And when these government authorities are used, if you misuse them and take money or engage in corruption, then you will disturb your own family and you yourself will become disturbed.

This text is taken from the auto-generated captions of the video—there may be errors in the words. Please listen to the video for the authentic discourse.

Original video: Bhajan Marg (YouTube)